This is how God works...

Okay, it's not how He works all the time, but check it out. Earlier this week I'm looking for a card for a friend. Happen across a card that might make another friend smile since she had a sucky day that day. I have to mail it to her across the country, but figure it'll still make her smile and hopefully she's having better days by the time it arrives.

I'm writing the card out and think "send her money." So I do. She gets it today, emails me to thank me, feels sort of bad since we're not rolling in dough and when I get home... get this... there's a card with a check for me from my aunt -- totally unexpected.

Is that God or what?

Reminds me that God blesses us not so we'll be rich, but so we'll be generous towards others. Personally, it's much more fun to give to others than to hoard for myself, even though I have issues with money. Guess I'm learning to let go.

On a sad note, one of my best buddy's brothers died this week as well as a friend of his -- on the same day no less. We're talking about it and he says one of the things he's realized from these passings is that it doesn't matter what we strive to attain. It's about the people. It's about going golfing with your brother and taking your sister out to breakfast because this life is mighty short and as we get older, it passes even quicker and quicker.

Another reminder to me that it's about the people.

So, here I am, feeling like I'm not living the life God has planned for me, but not knowing that that life should be. I pray for opportunities and insights. No pillars of fire have lit up my night to show me the way, but I also realize that a) sometimes you have to step out in faith towards some things and b) just because I don't feel like I'm doing His will as much as I could/should, that doesn't mean I'm not being used by Him more than I realize.

Lord, here I am. Use me.